Dude, Where's your dress?
I have never thought I would look very good in a dress. Maybe it’s because I just don’t have the legs for it. I am certainly not shaving mine. And I could never get my feet in those high heel stilettos, size 10 and a half. And no manner of jewelry or hats could do justice to my goatee.
But I knew that’s just what this guy was thinking. I had just handed coupons to the check out clerk at my local grocery store when he smirked and asked, “Your wife made you use those, didn’t she?” When I responded that no she didn’t and that I even cut them out myself, you could see the thought “Dude, where’s your dress” was running through his mind.
I can only imagine what he would have thought if he had known I was a stay at home dad of twin baby girls. Lets face it: my generation’s idea of the perfect stay at home parent was June Cleaver, Beaver’s mom. Wearing a dress with pearls while cooking and cleaning, she was the mom everyone dreamed of.
Today’s generation X-ers are more likely to think of Marge Simpson who is able to keep Homer and Bart alive from one day to the next while keeping her striking blue hair perfectly quaffed.
But neither generation would think of a burly gray bearded dad as the first choice. While there are more and more of us every year, stay at home dads are almost as mysterious as the duck billed platypus. A curiosity for sure, but most people don’t know what to make of us.
At first, my friends and family were supportive. Most admitted later that was only because they thought I would never go through with it. But as the time for my wife’s maternity leave came to an end and it became time to hand in my two-week notice, concern for my mental health increased.
During one Friday night poker game, the guys tried hard to talk me out of it. They pointed out it wouldn’t be nearly as easy as I thought it was. The funny thing is, I never thought it would be easy, far from it. Spending the next several years at home doing a job neither my forefathers nor I trained for would be far from easy. Add to it I am far from the most graceful person in the world (meaning they don’t send me to the store to pick up eggs) and there were would be more than a few challenges.
But that’s the great thing about being a stay at home dad: the challenges. And being able to teach your children to pull for the right sports teams, to play golf and to sing all of James Taylor’s songs. Oh, and there’s that whole education thing to teach them, too.
But just like women were forced to break through the “glass ceiling” men have to climb the “Huggies Mountain”. I now have a good idea what it must’ve been like for women when they first entered traditionally male-dominated fields like firefighting, police work or construction.
Which brings me back to the supermarket clerk. I wonder if he gave any thought to the fact that not too many years ago a male cashier at a grocery store was not natural either. Bring on the challenge and bring on double coupon days!
But I knew that’s just what this guy was thinking. I had just handed coupons to the check out clerk at my local grocery store when he smirked and asked, “Your wife made you use those, didn’t she?” When I responded that no she didn’t and that I even cut them out myself, you could see the thought “Dude, where’s your dress” was running through his mind.
I can only imagine what he would have thought if he had known I was a stay at home dad of twin baby girls. Lets face it: my generation’s idea of the perfect stay at home parent was June Cleaver, Beaver’s mom. Wearing a dress with pearls while cooking and cleaning, she was the mom everyone dreamed of.
Today’s generation X-ers are more likely to think of Marge Simpson who is able to keep Homer and Bart alive from one day to the next while keeping her striking blue hair perfectly quaffed.
But neither generation would think of a burly gray bearded dad as the first choice. While there are more and more of us every year, stay at home dads are almost as mysterious as the duck billed platypus. A curiosity for sure, but most people don’t know what to make of us.
At first, my friends and family were supportive. Most admitted later that was only because they thought I would never go through with it. But as the time for my wife’s maternity leave came to an end and it became time to hand in my two-week notice, concern for my mental health increased.
During one Friday night poker game, the guys tried hard to talk me out of it. They pointed out it wouldn’t be nearly as easy as I thought it was. The funny thing is, I never thought it would be easy, far from it. Spending the next several years at home doing a job neither my forefathers nor I trained for would be far from easy. Add to it I am far from the most graceful person in the world (meaning they don’t send me to the store to pick up eggs) and there were would be more than a few challenges.
But that’s the great thing about being a stay at home dad: the challenges. And being able to teach your children to pull for the right sports teams, to play golf and to sing all of James Taylor’s songs. Oh, and there’s that whole education thing to teach them, too.
But just like women were forced to break through the “glass ceiling” men have to climb the “Huggies Mountain”. I now have a good idea what it must’ve been like for women when they first entered traditionally male-dominated fields like firefighting, police work or construction.
Which brings me back to the supermarket clerk. I wonder if he gave any thought to the fact that not too many years ago a male cashier at a grocery store was not natural either. Bring on the challenge and bring on double coupon days!
posted by Twins Dad at 1:36 PM
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